John Mayer serenaded me through college. One of my favorite songs of his is Daughters.
Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers be good to your daughters too
As each year passes, I have some new revelation as a personal trainer. Diet soda drinkers are oftentimes the most unhealthy people. Clients lie about what they eat. Foam rolling does a body good. 20 minutes of hard work is better than 60 minutes of mediocre work. Do cardio at the end of the workout to save all your energy for strength training. Focus on behavior changes instead of outcomes.
This year, on separate occasions, I’ve encountered four beautiful women who have needed a little guidance along their fitness journey. These women are determined and driven to make healthy choices. The biggest obstacle in their path? Their moms. Christian, well-meaning moms. Their mothers belittle the time and money they spend at the gym. They feel pressure from their moms to cheat on their nutrition plan, split a bottle of wine, or order dessert. Misery loves company. Or on the contrary, they scrutinize everything their daughters eat, drink and wear; picking them apart until they feel like the 5 year old version of themselves.
Mothers have power to speak truth and purpose into our lives, but they can also be the voice of insecurity we struggle to forget. I’m so grateful that my mom has always been my biggest fan. She did not allow her insecurity to seep into my life, poisoning my expectations and self-image.
Oftentimes my first reaction is to be critical (especially of those I love) because people I love are connected to me, and I’m most critical of myself. I pray instead that I would be a source of encouragement, acceptance and approval for Paisley. I love every little thing about her and she needs to know that…when she’s a toddler and when she’s a mother herself someday.
If you’re a mom, give your daughter some grace. Cheer her on! She needs you, and you probably need her.