Between My Ears

I’ve learned a very profound truth from Finn and Paisley this month:

What we say about ourselves in our mind eventually becomes our reality.


Mindset is EVERYTHING for any real life change. Yeah, yeah, yeah…but I like action. I’m a doer. I do things…I don’t generally spend much time thinking about things. I often tell my clients not to “think about it, just do it.” We can waste time contemplating, worrying, planning about the good habits we need to establish instead of actually doing them.

mindset definition

In January, Craig preached about personal declarations, a message called, Words to Live By. Joey created his and recites them every morning. Great idea, I thought, but not for me.

Last month, my business mentors noticed I’ve been speaking negatively about my leadership skills, feeling very much like a failure. They told me to change my mindset. “It’s all between your ears, Ashley.” A couple friends told me to find and recite daily affirmations. Okay, okay.

So, I did. I found some online and then changed the verbiage so it included God instead of “the universe” and I taped them on my bathroom mirror under a note card with the word, SERVANT, my word for 2017. They are statements about the kind of leader, entrepreneur, mom, wife, and believer I AM and the kind of life I WANT.


I can’t tell you how awkward and clunky it feels to say overly-positive, optimistic, almost arrogant things about myself in the morning. It feels…contrived; and I value authenticity so much that to say positive things when I’m thinking negative things almost affronts my core values.

But, here’s what I’ve learned: when I’m filling my mind with positive thoughts, my thoughts become positive. Imagine that. 🙂 Thoughts of gratitude will have the same effect.


“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.” Philippians 4:8-9

My kids reinforced this truth for me. Here’s what I’ve heard them say just in the last week:


“I’m so strong.”

“I have lots of friends.”

“I can do anything.”

“I’m like a superhero.”

“I am really fast. No one can catch me.”


“I am so pretty today.”

“I am really really big.”

“I am so strong and brave.”

“I am going to be a princess in a really big dress.”

“I am so good at coloring.”


Where did they get such confident, overly positive thoughts? Well, Joey and I, of course. They’ve adopted our beliefs as their own. What’s in their minds hasn’t yet been polluted by comparison or the opinions of others. I envy them.

Last week Pastor Craig reminded us that comparison either makes us feel superior or inferior…and neither honors God.


When did I stop believing what my Heavenly Father says about me?

Probably as I scroll through Instagram. Or when I’m not in the Word, filling my mind with my Father’s thoughts. Or when I focus on my failures instead of my potential. Or when I allow Satan to warp my truth.

So much of the battle for all good things in our life is won (or lost) in our heads–between our ears. I pray you are combating your negativity with simple, biblical truths. And though it may be awkward at first, try say something positive about yourself and the life God gave you every morning.